Hi ya'll! I am still in so much shock it will be March next week...
I almost didn't post tonight.... because, well... just refer to the title.
If you're new around here and didn't know, for the last 5-6 years I've dealt with a chronic sleep disorder. This sleep issue has been the bane of my existence and is a constant flowing source of depression, irritability, and self doubt. It's name is Idiopathic Hypersomnia... (also... I not only hate the disorder, I can't stand the name).
I usually would go a little more into detail about the disorder, why it's real and not just me being extra whiny about being a tired Mom, but frankly I'm too tired to even get into that. So instead, I'm just going to explain, (*cough* complain), about how it's affecting me right now.
I haven't experienced symptoms as prominent as I am currently in probably over a year,
so it's a little defeating to say the least. With long naps every day, low energy levels, the embarrassingly horrible brain fog, and of course, the crushing fatigue... things have been a bit more of a struggle... and pretty much nothing in my life seems to be getting done or moving anywhere.
I've almost had to start thinking about it as though I have less hours in a day than the average person... or rather, I should be thinking about it that way; and then maybe I wouldn't feel so frustrated about it. But instead what I usually end up doing is writing a completely unreachable level of things to do during the day, (for even if I was at a normal functioning level), and then somehow hope that it motivates me out of this thing I literally have no control over.
I think that's the hardest part about some of these cards we're dealt in life... accepting the hand we've been given and trying to make the best move, using what we have. I've had times where I've been more accepting of these circumstances, in my issues with sleep and fatigue, but after doing worlds better for so long it seems I need a reminder in this lesson. I guess that's why I'm writing this now... and why I didn't for so long. It's a way to acknowledge to myself and to you that my sleep disorder is a real thing that affects my life in a major way, and I'm trying to navigate... again.
So why is it important to accept the things of life that we wish weren't our reality?? I find I'm generally more successful in coping and dealing with them when I do. It's hard to make a well laid plan and be successful using incorrect information to begin with. The same goes for our minds. We have to allow ourselves to acknowledge the correct information... what is actually the reality of our lives. It's only then, that we can begin to create a path that will ultimately lead us down the road to our success.